jc-c asked:

Hey

1. First impression: Why hello there hot stuff, my dorm is this way
2. Truth is: I’ll try my best to make this work
3. How old do you look: 19
4. Have you ever made me laugh: Yup
5. Have you ever made me mad: Nope
6. Best feature: Eyes
7. Have I ever had a crush on you: Yes
8. You’re my: Love
9. Name in my phone: Joe
10. Should you post this too? : You already did

heart:

you know the world is going to end when you’re about to sneeze and you have food in your mouth

Life, he realize, was much like a song. In the beginning there is mystery, in the end there is confirmation, but it’s in the middle where all the emotion resides to make the whole thing worthwhile.

Nicholas Sparks, The Last Song (via kushandwizdom)

surprisebitch:

dating tip: ask them to show you their recently used emojis so you can count your matches and see if you are compatible

Send me a ”hey” and i’ll do this:

1. First impression:
2. Truth is: 
3. How old do you look: 
4. Have you ever made me laugh:
5. Have you ever made me mad: 
6. Best feature:
7. Have I ever had a crush on you:
8. You’re my:
9. Name in my phone:
10. Should you post this too?

goingcrazystuckinhere:

peter-pans-booty-shorts:

ohhowlucky:

danteogodofsoup:

killbenedictcumberbatch:

standupcomedyblog:

John Mulaney | The Salt & Pepper Diner

THE BEST JOKE IN EXISTENCE

GOD I JUST TOLD SOMEONE ABOUT THIS STORY

This is one of the best pieces of comedy that I have ever had the pleasure of witnessing. I love this. I have been looking for this online for awhile.

This is my favorite story ever and I will reblog it every time I see it.

This is my favorite joke of all time